Interview by Interview: the Behind the Scenes of Big Sibs Selections

Since the transition from middle school to high school can be very challenging, Stuyvesant’s Big Sib program offers support by providing freshmen with a Big Sib: an upperclassman who acts as an “older sibling.” Being a Big Sib comes with various responsibilities, the most prominent of which is to guide and support incoming freshmen through their first year of high school. During the spring semester of each school year, current sophomores and juniors are invited to apply for the Big Sib program. The first phase of the application process involves the completion of a Google Form. For the second phase, the Big Sib Chairs conduct in-person interviews based on each applicant’s response. The interview process features an icebreaker to get to know the interviewee, questions for clarification about the Google Form, a quiz on general knowledge about Stuy, and a noteworthy roleplay in which interviewees decide on how to handle a contrived scenario involving Little Sibs. This year, with over 400 applicants competing for 150 spots, the pressure was on. 

As part of the selection process, each interview is conducted by both a senior and junior Big Sib Chair, blending experience with fresh insight. Senior and Big Sib Chair Munem Tajwar reflected on how that partnership developed. “There’s some things that you have to [do to] gain chemistry throughout the interviews. The first one is always going to be a little bit rocky because you don’t know what type of questions you want to ask, [or] how you want to ask them. The flow gets a little off sometimes, but as the interviews go on, [with] hours gone [in] Whole Foods, we managed to create a good tempo. I really enjoyed my time there,” he stated. 

In addition to the importance of teamwork between interviewers, senior and Big Sib Chair Adeline Sauberli emphasized how the emotions applicants reveal make a lasting impression. “It shouldn’t just be about what you think the Big Sib chairs want to hear. I think if you want to apply for this program, be excited about what this might mean for you to reflect on what you care about, what’s important, what your values are, how those values translate into leadership or anything you would do,” she stated. “I really love it when it feels like people we’re interviewing, even though they don’t know us, are vulnerable and speaking from the heart.” Sauberli’s perspective highlights core principles of the program itself—trust and empathy. She stresses the importance of showcasing genuineness, honesty, and authenticity during the interview.

Additionally, in an email interview, junior and Big Sib Chair Elijah Choi further advocated for leaving a strong impression. “The biggest piece of advice I could give is give both energy and enthusiasm. In terms of energy, it’s not just about bringing a lot of energy (which we also love!), it’s about giving the right energy that allows the interview to have a good vibe. In terms of enthusiasm, we want to see applicants show how much they want to be a Big Sib, and how, for the whole school year, they’ll be able to maintain that enthusiasm and positivity. It’s kinda cliché but we love when interviewees are able to show us rather than simply telling us!” Choi explained. What matters most in an interview is the interviewee’s authentic personality. 

Sophomore Anika Tapadar reflected on this, especially noting the importance of the icebreaker segment. “Something that you really have to show is personality. A reason why [bringing in food] doesn’t work as well as you would expect it to is that unless you have a really good story to go along with it, or showing that, ‘Oh, yeah. I’ve always been into baking, and it’s like my thing,’ it doesn’t really show much about you other than, oh, I brought you food,” she described. Tapadar emphasizes a crucial aspect of the icebreaker:  personal connection. Without this, even a well-intentioned action may lack impact.

Arguably, the most memorable section of the interviews is the improvised scenario performed by the interviewers. During this section, the interviewers take on the role of freshmen, acting out a scenario based on an event they chose. The interviewee is then required to take on the role of a Big Sib, mediating or controlling the situation at hand. Several applicants commented on how that portion of their interview was the most challenging or, perhaps, the most intriguing. “The most difficult part of the interview was the scenarios because everything else you could answer pretty easily. But there were some really weird [scenarios]. The one I got was really weird and I [wasn’t sure] how to respond. It was something about how one of the Little Sibs complained that another Little Sib smells bad and he had to be nice or whatever,” sophomore Felicity Tan shared.

Sophomore Wenni Lu also reflected on her experience with the improv-style scenario, noting that the unique experience allowed her to discover something unexpected about herself. “The scenario is probably the worst because I wanted to be more bubbly and actually supportive [in] the way I was thinking [of] in my head. But actually doing it made me realize that I’m just the same as any other person trying to comfort anyone. I wanted to be this cheerful Big Sib that helps the Little Sib with her 50 on her biology exam but I just turned out to be really awkward, stuttering a lot when I’m giving them the advice,” she stated. Big Sib interviews can also help applicants learn more about themselves; while Lu initially viewed the situation in a negative light, her reflection highlights the significance of sincerity. Despite the discomfort she experienced with delivery, the experience reminded her that genuineness, even with imperfections, is usually what matters most. 

Many students feel that there is an element of bias involved in Big Sib interviews, as they are run by students who often know each other. Acknowledging the challenge involving bias, Sauberli explained, “Sometimes you’ll have an applicant who everyone has heard of, and then you need to find who might be the least biased. We really try to avoid having someone that the interviewer knows. Because that’s an awkward position for someone interviewing to be a victim to be in, where they know the person and have to argue their case, and I’m not sure that’s really fair all the time.” Underlying social networks together with the inherent nature of social interactions make it rather difficult to judge applicants with pure fairness. Even with precautions like avoiding known applicants, the program must navigate complicated social structures to achieve as little bias as possible.

The Big Sib Chairs expressed their heartfelt thoughts for the interviewing process as well as the applicants themselves. “Each interview, I’m thankful that they want to join the club. That means apart [from] being a chair, I did something correctly. And all the Big Sibs that work with us, [...] they did something correctly because they were able to inspire or motivate a new incoming group of people to want to be Big Sibs. And that’s what tells me the program is working. Every program has its missteps, but if we want, if we’re actually inspiring underclassmen to be the upperclassmen, that helps out the incoming underclassmen. That’s probably the best thing to me. We can’t accept everyone, [...] [but the] majority of the applicants have great interviews, and I’m really thankful that they want to be a Big Sib,” Tajwar reflected. The Big Sib Chairs care not only about the success of the program, but also about the students who will potentially carry it forward. Tajwar is appreciative of every interviewee, as their dedication and excitement about Big Sibs is what allows the program to live on.

Selecting Big Sibs isn’t just about selecting mentors, but rather choosing students who lead with patience, heart, honesty, and integrity. Each interview is unique as is its applicant, and it is mutual dedication from both interviewers and interviewees that fuels the Big Sib program. Even though some interviews don’t always end with the desired outcome, what matters most is that the incoming class has the smoothest transition possible.