Humor
Quesadilla Clara: Issue 8
Some of my friends have been talking about me behind my back, and it’s really bothering me. Should I confront them or just let it go?
Why Stuyvesant Students Keep Losing Their OMNY Cards
By Deon Woon
Rats from the Subway are stealing Stuyvesant students’ OMNY cards.
Deny, Defend, Desire (A Y/N x Luigi Mangione Fanfiction)
By Faiza Rumman, Jiaheng Lukas Yao, Sara Bhuiyan, Syed Ali
Y/N finds out that their one true love, Luigi Mangione, is in jail…the only option now is to break him out.
Choral Carols
By Nicole Liu
Stuyvesant’s choral department introduces a new festive policy and Christmas-themed chaos ensues.
Bad Grade Week at Stuy Causes Students to “Tweak Out”
By Diya Mallu, Faiza Rumman, Syed Ali
Students share horror stories from “bad grade week,” a teacher-planned torture experience.
New Year's Resolutions: Stuy & Celebrity Edition
By Erin Cho, Fiona 'Eve' Lin, Myles Vuong
New year, definitely new us…
The Humor Department’s Favorite Holiday Gifts
Spec waxes nostalgic about their favorite gifts from this holiday season! They’re, uh… definitely gifts.
Who Memorizes the World Map?
Cartographers start to have fun with America’s lack of geography skills, removing parts of the world map little by little.
2024 is Ending, so Why Not Do It For the Plot
You haven’t done anything this year, but the year isn’t over just yet. Here are some helpful suggestions to how you can finally feel the warmth of someone else’s embrace or perhaps burn down the kitchen you’ve always wanted to burn down.
A Turkey Social Experiment
By Jake Chan
Stuyvesant freshmen simulate the feelings of turkeys before Thanksgiving
Why Is It So Hard To Commit Election Fraud?!
By Selina Lin
A would-be election fraudster attempts to foil the 2024 Election.
Thanksgiving Dinner: The Turkeys Fight Back
By Selina Lin
A turkey group plans their resistance to the slaughter of their kind during the Thanksgiving season.
The Cabinet of Abominations
By Adeline Sauberli, Astrid Harrington
Surprised by some of Trump’s recent cabinet picks? He can explain.
Getting Personal: The Edits of Stuyvesant’s College Essays
With early applications done, The Spectator asked students and teachers what the worst part of the essay editing process was.
Looking in the (Couch) Crack
By Jubaida Shahriar, Munem Tajwar
The salacious news of JD Vance's affair with a couch shocked the American public, but letters between the two reveal their relationship was much more than a hook-up.
What Not to Do at Thanksgiving Dinner
By Dale Heller, Gabriella Hoefner
A comprehensive list of bad Thanksgiving habits to avoid.
MatchGPT: Love Has Never Been More Real!
An advertisement for a new dating app that relies on AI technology.
Stuy Speaks For the Trees
By Diya Mallu
Principal Yu goes to new extremes to ‘save the trees,’ leading to unintended student fallout.
A Strange SATurday
You’ve found a way to break the system and take the paper SAT instead of the digital version.
Stuyvesant Experiences Insane Blackout!
By Alexis Qian
Exclusive coverage on Stuyvesant’s recent blackout! I cannot see what I’m writing (please help).
Mars Bars and Mickey Mouse: The Stuy Student’s Guide to Movies for This Halloween Season
I’d like to extend a generous invitation to read this compilation of the Disney Halloween movies that Stuyvesant students will relate to the most.
Not Clickbait! Stuyvesant High School's Faculty Halloween Cooking Contest, Now Live!
By Selina Lin
A student documents the treats at the annual Stuyvesant faculty’s Halloween cooking contest.
Stuyves-haunt High School
By Lina Zheng
A student walks into Stuyvesant High School, but everything is extremely weird and a little suspicious.
US Congress, Where The Only Thing Being Passed Is The Zombie Virus
By Eli Smith
Zombies have taken over the US Congress, but has anything changed?
The Pipette Ghost
By Fiona Chen
A Stuy senior gets haunted by a chemistry-loving, pipette-shaped ghost, but more so by the thought of being rejected from college.
The Manifesto of the People’s Republic of Stuyvesant High School
The tyrannical Student Union, which was a mere front for the oppressive robotique class, was overthrown last Friday by teacher Karla Stalinan and her senior student Vladislava Leninova. Here is our vision for the new regime, ruled by YOU, the people.
SHOCKING TEACHERS TAKE ON INTERNET DEBATES (NOT CLICKBAIT!!)
By Astrid Harrington, Erin Cho, Fiona 'Eve' Lin
Ever wanted to know what your favorite teachers, from Ms. Alonso to Mx. Stuzin, think about these controversial questions on the internet? Read this article to find out!
The Second Failure of Congestion Pricing
Stuyvesant tries and fails to implement congestion pricing in the sixth floor hallway.
One of Those Rare Times When You Shouldn’t Play the Triangle
A teacher isn’t sure what to do with the five students left in his class, and decides to keep them entertained in various ways.
The Chances of Alien Invasion are High, but Our Percentage of Brainrot is Higher
By Fiona Chen
Aliens exist and seem to have hostile intentions against our race, but our recent astronomically high levels of brainrot have left these aliens unsure of whether or not to put their doomsday plan into motion.
2025’s Brand New Resolutions
Stuyvesant students are ready to make their New Year’s resolutions for 2025, but what are the most common ones made every year?
One of Those Rare Times When You Shouldn’t Play the Triangle
A teacher isn’t sure what to do with the five students left in his class, and decides to keep them entertained in various ways.
The Chances of Alien Invasion are High, but Our Percentage of Brainrot is Higher
By Fiona Chen
Aliens exist and seem to have hostile intentions against our race, but our recent astronomically high levels of brainrot have left these aliens unsure of whether or not to put their doomsday plan into motion.
College Board Changes AP Spanish Test, Leaves Students Baffled
By Selina Lin, Tamiyyah Shafiq
College Board suddenly changes the AP Spanish exam to focus on Dora the Explorer.
Quesadilla Clara: Issue 8
Some of my friends have been talking about me behind my back, and it’s really bothering me. Should I confront them or just let it go?
Why Stuyvesant Students Keep Losing Their OMNY Cards
By Deon Woon
Rats from the Subway are stealing Stuyvesant students’ OMNY cards.
Deny, Defend, Desire (A Y/N x Luigi Mangione Fanfiction)
By Faiza Rumman, Jiaheng Lukas Yao, Sara Bhuiyan, Syed Ali
Y/N finds out that their one true love, Luigi Mangione, is in jail…the only option now is to break him out.
Choral Carols
By Nicole Liu
Stuyvesant’s choral department introduces a new festive policy and Christmas-themed chaos ensues.
Bad Grade Week at Stuy Causes Students to “Tweak Out”
By Diya Mallu, Faiza Rumman, Syed Ali
Students share horror stories from “bad grade week,” a teacher-planned torture experience.
New Year's Resolutions: Stuy & Celebrity Edition
By Erin Cho, Fiona 'Eve' Lin, Myles Vuong
New year, definitely new us…
The Humor Department’s Favorite Holiday Gifts
Spec waxes nostalgic about their favorite gifts from this holiday season! They’re, uh… definitely gifts.
Who Memorizes the World Map?
Cartographers start to have fun with America’s lack of geography skills, removing parts of the world map little by little.
2024 is Ending, so Why Not Do It For the Plot
You haven’t done anything this year, but the year isn’t over just yet. Here are some helpful suggestions to how you can finally feel the warmth of someone else’s embrace or perhaps burn down the kitchen you’ve always wanted to burn down.
A Turkey Social Experiment
By Jake Chan
Stuyvesant freshmen simulate the feelings of turkeys before Thanksgiving
Why Is It So Hard To Commit Election Fraud?!
By Selina Lin
A would-be election fraudster attempts to foil the 2024 Election.
Thanksgiving Dinner: The Turkeys Fight Back
By Selina Lin
A turkey group plans their resistance to the slaughter of their kind during the Thanksgiving season.
Looking in the (Couch) Crack
By Jubaida Shahriar, Munem Tajwar
The salacious news of JD Vance's affair with a couch shocked the American public, but letters between the two reveal their relationship was much more than a hook-up.
The Cabinet of Abominations
By Adeline Sauberli, Astrid Harrington
Surprised by some of Trump’s recent cabinet picks? He can explain.
What Not to Do at Thanksgiving Dinner
By Dale Heller, Gabriella Hoefner
A comprehensive list of bad Thanksgiving habits to avoid.
Getting Personal: The Edits of Stuyvesant’s College Essays
With early applications done, The Spectator asked students and teachers what the worst part of the essay editing process was.
The Ultimate ‘Why Us?’ College Essay
By Daniella Solomon, Sasha Ruinsky
Average student writes a totally ordinary “Why us?” college essay.
Mars Bars and Mickey Mouse: The Stuy Student’s Guide to Movies for This Halloween Season
I’d like to extend a generous invitation to read this compilation of the Disney Halloween movies that Stuyvesant students will relate to the most.
Not Clickbait! Stuyvesant High School's Faculty Halloween Cooking Contest, Now Live!
By Selina Lin
A student documents the treats at the annual Stuyvesant faculty’s Halloween cooking contest.
Stuyves-haunt High School
By Lina Zheng
A student walks into Stuyvesant High School, but everything is extremely weird and a little suspicious.
US Congress, Where The Only Thing Being Passed Is The Zombie Virus
By Eli Smith
Zombies have taken over the US Congress, but has anything changed?
The Pipette Ghost
By Fiona Chen
A Stuy senior gets haunted by a chemistry-loving, pipette-shaped ghost, but more so by the thought of being rejected from college.
The Manifesto of the People’s Republic of Stuyvesant High School
The tyrannical Student Union, which was a mere front for the oppressive robotique class, was overthrown last Friday by teacher Karla Stalinan and her senior student Vladislava Leninova. Here is our vision for the new regime, ruled by YOU, the people.
MatchGPT: Love Has Never Been More Real!
An advertisement for a new dating app that relies on AI technology.
SHOCKING TEACHERS TAKE ON INTERNET DEBATES (NOT CLICKBAIT!!)
By Astrid Harrington, Erin Cho, Fiona 'Eve' Lin
Ever wanted to know what your favorite teachers, from Ms. Alonso to Mx. Stuzin, think about these controversial questions on the internet? Read this article to find out!
Stuy Speaks For the Trees
By Diya Mallu
Principal Yu goes to new extremes to ‘save the trees,’ leading to unintended student fallout.
The Second Failure of Congestion Pricing
Stuyvesant tries and fails to implement congestion pricing in the sixth floor hallway.
A Strange SATurday
You’ve found a way to break the system and take the paper SAT instead of the digital version.